1 00:00:00,933 --> 00:00:02,266 ADAMU: We're all inside of this place trying 2 00:00:02,266 --> 00:00:05,066 to find our way out of here, but also trying 3 00:00:05,066 --> 00:00:08,100 to find a way to be together in spite of the separations 4 00:00:08,100 --> 00:00:10,700 that are inherent in the prison structure. 5 00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:15,033 DANIELLE: This was 1993, the last day I was with them 6 00:00:15,033 --> 00:00:16,266 in the free world. 7 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:20,700 KRISTAL: The prisons are so far, 8 00:00:20,700 --> 00:00:23,866 I mean hours, away from Philly. 9 00:00:23,866 --> 00:00:27,633 I started the van service to keep families connected. 10 00:00:29,700 --> 00:00:34,500 CROWD: Welcome home, welcome home! 11 00:00:34,500 --> 00:00:35,466 ADAMU: What feels important 12 00:00:35,466 --> 00:00:37,133 is how we are building community 13 00:00:37,133 --> 00:00:39,133 by using the power of telling our stories 14 00:00:39,133 --> 00:00:41,200 to change the system that incarcerated us. 15 00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:45,133 (upbeat music) 16 00:00:49,066 --> 00:00:51,133 KRISTAL: If any of y'all have any loved ones 17 00:00:52,466 --> 00:00:55,033 that's incarcerated, I encourage y'all to go see them 18 00:00:55,033 --> 00:00:56,800 because they are coming home. 19 00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:58,266 DANIELLE: I am home but I am not free. 20 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:02,300 I am not free because my sisters are not free. 21 00:01:03,433 --> 00:01:07,933 Free her, free her, free her, free her, free her! 22 00:01:07,933 --> 00:01:09,266 STEVIE: I feel a deep responsibility 23 00:01:09,266 --> 00:01:12,000 to make sure that this moment doesn't pass. 24 00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:14,233 - You got you out- LONNIE: No, we got me out. 25 00:01:14,233 --> 00:01:15,233 KRISTAL: I feel like a little girl, 26 00:01:15,233 --> 00:01:17,366 like, ah, my mom and my dad. 27 00:01:18,433 --> 00:01:20,366 DANIELLE: I'm just trying to figure 28 00:01:20,366 --> 00:01:23,966 this whole freedom thing out, what's my purpose. 29 00:01:27,700 --> 00:01:30,466 DEL TORO: This is our Liberated Lives Meet the Makers 30 00:01:30,466 --> 00:01:31,933 conversation. 31 00:01:31,933 --> 00:01:34,433 uncovering the silent struggles 32 00:01:34,433 --> 00:01:37,466 and triumphs of those touched by incarceration 33 00:01:37,466 --> 00:01:41,066 while aiming to bridge the gaps of societal narratives 34 00:01:41,066 --> 00:01:44,033 with reconciliation, resilience and redemption. 35 00:01:44,033 --> 00:01:47,266 Filmmaker Adamu Chan tells his story of incarceration 36 00:01:47,266 --> 00:01:50,166 through the lenses of dignity and determination, 37 00:01:50,166 --> 00:01:54,000 and how he found positivity in the most confined space. 38 00:01:55,333 --> 00:01:58,533 Adamu, you tell your story in such a unique way 39 00:01:58,533 --> 00:02:01,366 and you're using poetry, music 40 00:02:01,366 --> 00:02:04,100 to capture the power of your voice. 41 00:02:04,100 --> 00:02:06,900 Why did you decide to take this approach? 42 00:02:06,900 --> 00:02:09,300 - I think originally I had thought 43 00:02:09,300 --> 00:02:12,766 about telling a more journalistic piece 44 00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:16,333 about the COVID outbreak that happened at San Quentin 45 00:02:16,333 --> 00:02:18,700 and the organizing that I was a part of 46 00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:20,700 and a lot of other folks were a part of. 47 00:02:20,700 --> 00:02:24,533 But it seemed like a more personal approach had more power 48 00:02:24,533 --> 00:02:26,100 and more impact. 49 00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:28,533 And also I wanted to bring my friends into this, 50 00:02:28,533 --> 00:02:30,466 into the fold and tell the stories of the people 51 00:02:30,466 --> 00:02:32,766 that I was closest to through letters 52 00:02:32,766 --> 00:02:35,733 and through the writing that we shared across walls 53 00:02:35,733 --> 00:02:37,000 and the communication that we shared 54 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:40,500 across walls seemed like the best way to do that. 55 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:48,266 - This is a Valentine's Day card from you, very cute. 56 00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,266 You always gave me Valentine's Day cards. 57 00:02:51,266 --> 00:02:53,133 Your presence in my life makes me a better 58 00:02:53,133 --> 00:02:54,000 more whole person. 59 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,333 That's right, you see? 60 00:02:55,333 --> 00:02:57,566 - Did you have a filmmaking background? 61 00:02:57,566 --> 00:03:02,533 - I did not, I had the privilege of learning filmmaking 62 00:03:03,566 --> 00:03:05,066 inside of San Quentin's media center. 63 00:03:05,066 --> 00:03:09,366 And at the time, I really understood that privilege 64 00:03:09,366 --> 00:03:12,933 that we were maybe the only incarcerated people anywhere 65 00:03:12,933 --> 00:03:16,266 in the world that were able to have video cameras. 66 00:03:16,266 --> 00:03:20,633 And as a crew, as a group of filmmakers inside 67 00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:24,466 that really informed our purpose that we had this platform 68 00:03:24,466 --> 00:03:26,800 that no one else had and we had to speak 69 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:28,866 to something greater than ourselves, 70 00:03:28,866 --> 00:03:31,133 than our own personal stories. 71 00:03:31,133 --> 00:03:33,533 More than anything else, what feels important 72 00:03:33,533 --> 00:03:36,033 is how we are building community by using the power 73 00:03:36,033 --> 00:03:37,966 of telling our stories to change the system 74 00:03:37,966 --> 00:03:39,333 that incarcerated us. 75 00:03:39,333 --> 00:03:41,066 I carried that with me when I came out too. 76 00:03:41,066 --> 00:03:44,400 I wanted to tell a story that reached across walls. 77 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:47,466 This was a film that I wanted to prioritize folks 78 00:03:47,466 --> 00:03:50,266 who are currently incarcerated as a primary audience. 79 00:03:50,266 --> 00:03:52,700 I wanted to do this for them so that they could watch it. 80 00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:54,866 And one of my impact goals was 81 00:03:54,866 --> 00:03:57,000 to try to get a national broadcast 82 00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,533 because I know that people inside watch PBS. 83 00:03:59,533 --> 00:04:03,566 I watched it, it was a big part of my growth as a filmmaker, 84 00:04:03,566 --> 00:04:07,066 my interests and my way of seeing the outside world 85 00:04:07,066 --> 00:04:08,666 and expanding my imagination 86 00:04:08,666 --> 00:04:12,066 and connecting with other people's stories. 87 00:04:12,066 --> 00:04:16,733 - Have your fellow inmates, friends, have they gotten 88 00:04:16,733 --> 00:04:21,700 to see the film and what reaction have you gotten from them? 89 00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:23,466 - Yeah, so one of the issues 90 00:04:23,466 --> 00:04:28,533 with being a formerly incarcerated filmmaker is 91 00:04:29,933 --> 00:04:33,866 that there are some biases that exist 92 00:04:33,866 --> 00:04:35,366 with the administration. 93 00:04:35,366 --> 00:04:38,666 I'm not just a regular filmmaker 94 00:04:38,666 --> 00:04:41,733 and maybe some of the things that I have done, 95 00:04:41,733 --> 00:04:44,033 maybe the film itself feels subversive 96 00:04:44,033 --> 00:04:47,033 and I haven't been able to show the film inside. 97 00:04:47,033 --> 00:04:48,400 So this would be the first time 98 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:50,166 that folks inside would be able to watch. 99 00:04:50,166 --> 00:04:53,866 And so I'm really excited about that. 100 00:04:53,866 --> 00:04:55,866 You know, beyond that, when I was inside, 101 00:04:55,866 --> 00:04:58,566 we were producing a TV show that was going out 102 00:04:58,566 --> 00:05:00,833 to all 36 prisons in California, 103 00:05:00,833 --> 00:05:02,066 and I know the impact of that. 104 00:05:02,066 --> 00:05:03,466 I still see the impact of that. 105 00:05:03,466 --> 00:05:05,333 Like when I'm out on the streets and I see people 106 00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:07,733 who are formerly incarcerated and they came 107 00:05:07,733 --> 00:05:09,266 from other prisons, they'll tell me, they'll be like, 108 00:05:09,266 --> 00:05:12,833 "I saw you on TV and those stories reached me." 109 00:05:12,833 --> 00:05:15,633 So I know that this will have impact. 110 00:05:15,633 --> 00:05:20,233 And for my friends and loved ones that are still inside 111 00:05:20,233 --> 00:05:24,666 who see what we've been able to do with this film, 112 00:05:24,666 --> 00:05:27,533 it already has a impact on them. 113 00:05:27,533 --> 00:05:30,366 It has broadened their horizons. 114 00:05:30,366 --> 00:05:34,600 I'm just excited for what this will open up for other folks, 115 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:38,200 not just as filmmakers but as creatives, as organizers, 116 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,166 as people who are trying to dream bigger 117 00:05:40,166 --> 00:05:42,333 than their circumstances. 118 00:05:42,333 --> 00:05:44,166 - What were some of the important things 119 00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:48,100 that you wanted the audience to know about your story? 120 00:05:48,100 --> 00:05:49,733 - This is a story about relationships 121 00:05:49,733 --> 00:05:51,366 and it's a story about communities. 122 00:05:51,366 --> 00:05:54,400 And the dominate narratives about resistance 123 00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:58,366 against the correction system are these stories about Attica 124 00:05:58,366 --> 00:06:01,733 and about George Jackson and these violent uprisings, 125 00:06:01,733 --> 00:06:05,500 but I feel like people are resisting every day. 126 00:06:05,500 --> 00:06:08,066 And some of these other stories are about families 127 00:06:08,066 --> 00:06:11,333 on the outside who are every day doing the work 128 00:06:11,333 --> 00:06:14,000 and the mothers and loved ones 129 00:06:15,300 --> 00:06:18,366 who are such an important part of this resistance 130 00:06:18,366 --> 00:06:21,433 which is just relationships like the relationships 131 00:06:21,433 --> 00:06:22,933 that people have and the relationships 132 00:06:22,933 --> 00:06:27,866 that people maintain that actually keep people alive. 133 00:06:27,866 --> 00:06:30,266 - Relationships are active resiliency 134 00:06:30,266 --> 00:06:32,800 and a pushback against the isolation. 135 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:36,233 Isolation is actually a root cause of crime. 136 00:06:36,233 --> 00:06:38,933 Without feeling loved, it's hard to love. 137 00:06:38,933 --> 00:06:41,133 If you don't care, you're a dangerous person. 138 00:06:41,133 --> 00:06:42,533 - Sometimes I feel like the focus is 139 00:06:42,533 --> 00:06:45,666 on the political work, the advocacy. 140 00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:47,033 Those things are really important 141 00:06:47,033 --> 00:06:50,466 but I don't wanna understate the importance 142 00:06:50,466 --> 00:06:53,433 of people's connections with their communities 143 00:06:53,433 --> 00:06:55,066 and their loved ones. 144 00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:59,133 Isolation, violence, these things are not helping 145 00:06:59,133 --> 00:07:02,333 anyone's mental health and in many ways exacerbating it, 146 00:07:02,333 --> 00:07:03,933 making it much worse. 147 00:07:03,933 --> 00:07:07,533 And then we expect people to come home and function 148 00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:13,366 when they've been traumatized more than they were originally 149 00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:18,433 and carry the shame and stigma of having a criminal record. 150 00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:23,066 - How are you hoping that your film is received? 151 00:07:23,066 --> 00:07:27,266 - I think back to when I was in solitary 152 00:07:27,266 --> 00:07:31,766 and when I got there I felt very alone. 153 00:07:31,766 --> 00:07:36,833 And the person in the cell next to me reached out 154 00:07:37,900 --> 00:07:39,766 and asked me if I needed some food, 155 00:07:39,766 --> 00:07:42,266 asked me if I needed some cosmetics, 156 00:07:42,266 --> 00:07:44,566 if I needed a book to read. 157 00:07:44,566 --> 00:07:49,633 And when the books came through the cell doors, 158 00:07:52,700 --> 00:07:57,766 I read Malcolm X and I read Audre Lorde and I read Assata 159 00:07:58,566 --> 00:07:59,666 and they were there with me. 160 00:07:59,666 --> 00:08:02,000 And every day when it was mail call 161 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:06,366 when I received a letter, my loved ones were there with me. 162 00:08:06,366 --> 00:08:11,266 And so I think about this kind of black tradition 163 00:08:11,266 --> 00:08:15,066 of sharing our stories and how it bridges the gaps 164 00:08:15,066 --> 00:08:19,033 across the diaspora and how we build solidarity 165 00:08:19,033 --> 00:08:24,100 with each other through that, how we feel not so alone 166 00:08:24,900 --> 00:08:26,700 in the most isolated places. 167 00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:29,433 For the first time in almost 12 years in prison, 168 00:08:29,433 --> 00:08:31,133 I feel connected to a purpose. 169 00:08:31,133 --> 00:08:35,000 How we raise each other, raise our spirits together 170 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:40,066 and I hope the film will play some small role in that, 171 00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:46,866 in bridging gaps and bridging the distances 172 00:08:48,900 --> 00:08:52,133 and getting people to believe in solidarity. 173 00:08:52,133 --> 00:08:56,366 I think it's something that's transformed my life 174 00:08:56,366 --> 00:08:59,366 and I've seen it transform other people's lives 175 00:08:59,366 --> 00:09:00,766 and people are doing it every day. 176 00:09:00,766 --> 00:09:03,200 And I just think that this is another way 177 00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:05,100 to exercise that muscle. 178 00:09:05,100 --> 00:09:08,366 - How are you readjusting to life outside of prison? 179 00:09:08,366 --> 00:09:10,466 - You know I've been privileged to be a part of a community 180 00:09:10,466 --> 00:09:15,533 of folks who come home and who have supported each other. 181 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:17,133 But it's difficult. 182 00:09:17,133 --> 00:09:19,133 You go through different phases 183 00:09:19,133 --> 00:09:22,966 of processing what you've been through 184 00:09:22,966 --> 00:09:24,533 and coming to grips with it. 185 00:09:24,533 --> 00:09:27,066 This is my fourth year of being home. 186 00:09:27,066 --> 00:09:28,333 It's difficult. 187 00:09:28,333 --> 00:09:30,466 The first year is you wake up every day 188 00:09:30,466 --> 00:09:34,333 and everything's beautiful and it's a blessing to be home. 189 00:09:34,333 --> 00:09:37,933 And then as you move through it, things get more difficult. 190 00:09:37,933 --> 00:09:41,433 Things begin to settle and you start coming to terms 191 00:09:41,433 --> 00:09:43,433 with what's happened to you and what's happened 192 00:09:43,433 --> 00:09:45,000 to the people around you. 193 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,766 I can't help but think of all those 194 00:09:46,766 --> 00:09:49,033 who are still behind the walls of San Quentin. 195 00:09:49,033 --> 00:09:51,233 The psychological and emotional distance 196 00:09:51,233 --> 00:09:53,300 that cuts through the core of what feels like one 197 00:09:53,300 --> 00:09:56,966 of our most human needs, to be deeply connected to others. 198 00:09:58,166 --> 00:10:00,533 I mean, I don't think the prison system works 199 00:10:00,533 --> 00:10:05,300 and these issues of safety that people have so much anxiety 200 00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:09,400 and fear about can be dealt with in different ways 201 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:12,866 when we recognize everyone's humanity and the fact 202 00:10:12,866 --> 00:10:15,700 that everyone deserves love and care. 203 00:10:16,033 --> 00:10:18,466 DEL TORO: Adamu Chan, thank you so much for spending time 204 00:10:18,466 --> 00:10:21,766 with us to talk about your film, What The Walls Wont Hold.