WEBVTT 00:01.133 --> 00:03.100 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% LISA ABELAR: I'd look at him and I'd look at the water, 00:03.100 --> 00:04.666 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% and then I'd look at him 00:04.666 --> 00:06.333 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and I'd look at the water, and at some point, 00:06.333 --> 00:08.700 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% he said, "You know, the story's better if you jump." 00:08.700 --> 00:10.500 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% MARTHA MOYER: Now, on the wall of the tent, 00:10.500 --> 00:11.666 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% I could see a shadow. 00:11.666 --> 00:13.900 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% It has paws with claws. 00:13.900 --> 00:15.766 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% It's the bear. 00:15.766 --> 00:17.133 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% JYNELLE HERBERT: Next time I look back, 00:17.133 --> 00:19.933 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% my eyes nearly pop out of my head. 00:19.933 --> 00:23.533 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Instead of riding atop the horse, she's on its side. 00:23.533 --> 00:24.933 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 00:24.933 --> 00:27.233 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% She looked like a stuntman in a shoot-'em-up Western. 00:27.233 --> 00:28.666 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 00:28.666 --> 00:30.066 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪ 00:31.133 --> 00:32.600 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪ 00:32.600 --> 00:35.066 align:left position:40% line:83% size:50% ABELAR: My name is Lisa Abelar. 00:35.066 --> 00:38.333 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I am a born and raised Michigan girl 00:38.333 --> 00:40.300 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% that transplanted to Arizona. 00:40.300 --> 00:42.700 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% By day, I'm a writer, 00:42.700 --> 00:47.533 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and try to find adventure or be outside as much as possible. 00:47.533 --> 00:49.733 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% And I understand that you share quite a bit 00:49.733 --> 00:52.100 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% about being a mom and an adventurer 00:52.100 --> 00:53.166 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% on your Instagram? 00:53.166 --> 00:54.400 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% My personal Instagram, for sure, 00:54.400 --> 00:56.900 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% but then also we have an outdoor Instagram 00:56.900 --> 00:59.700 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% called Raising Outdoor Kids, where we just 00:59.700 --> 01:03.700 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% share our outdoor adventures as a way to try to 01:03.700 --> 01:07.200 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% inspire other people to do things that may seem difficult, 01:07.200 --> 01:09.500 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% but really, like, you can do it. 01:09.500 --> 01:11.900 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And with kids, you know, because they might think 01:11.900 --> 01:13.866 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% that kids aren't able to do certain things yet, 01:13.866 --> 01:15.533 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% but we're doing it, 01:15.533 --> 01:17.533 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% so if we're doing it, others can do it. 01:17.533 --> 01:19.433 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% So what are you hoping that the audience takes away 01:19.433 --> 01:20.733 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% from your story tonight? 01:20.733 --> 01:22.733 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% I think there's two parts. 01:22.733 --> 01:24.433 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% You don't have to know everything 01:24.433 --> 01:26.566 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% about what you're doing to do it. 01:26.566 --> 01:28.433 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% You can think you're prepared, you know, 01:28.433 --> 01:30.233 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% um, and prepare yourself enough, 01:30.233 --> 01:32.166 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% but you don't have to be an expert at something 01:32.166 --> 01:33.600 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% to, to something and get something out of it. 01:33.600 --> 01:34.800 align:left position:40% line:89% size:50% Mm-hmm. 01:34.800 --> 01:37.600 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% And, um, you know, in that same vein, 01:37.600 --> 01:38.700 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% just to, like, do the thing, 01:38.700 --> 01:40.933 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% You can get so much more out of it 01:40.933 --> 01:42.533 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% if you just go for it 01:42.533 --> 01:44.100 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% rather than sit around and think about it. 01:44.100 --> 01:46.366 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪ 01:46.366 --> 01:47.466 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% Six years ago, 01:47.466 --> 01:49.166 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% I walked out of an R.E.I. store 01:49.166 --> 01:52.100 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% with my arms full of gear I had no idea how to use. 01:52.100 --> 01:55.200 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% I had a fresh receipt for a water bladder, 01:55.200 --> 01:56.600 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% which the sales guy told me 01:56.600 --> 01:58.200 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% would hold my water for me on my back 01:58.200 --> 02:01.366 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and gave me a little straw to drink it from as I hiked. 02:01.366 --> 02:02.966 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% And I ran home, 02:02.966 --> 02:04.900 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and I overpacked my rented backpack 02:04.900 --> 02:06.700 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% with everything I thought I would need 02:06.700 --> 02:08.900 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% for my first-ever backpacking trip, 02:08.900 --> 02:11.133 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% which was going to be a four-day excursion 02:11.133 --> 02:12.666 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% to the bottom of the Grand Canyon 02:12.666 --> 02:15.200 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% and over to Havasupai Falls, 02:15.200 --> 02:18.833 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% this magical oasis of waterfalls 02:18.833 --> 02:22.333 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% that almost impossibly just pop up out of the desert 02:22.333 --> 02:24.766 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% in this remote corner of the canyon, 02:24.766 --> 02:25.933 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% and they run with this water 02:25.933 --> 02:28.866 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% that is just a perfect crystal-blue. 02:28.866 --> 02:30.466 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% And I didn't really know 02:30.466 --> 02:32.200 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% what I was doing as a backpacker, obviously, 02:32.200 --> 02:33.833 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% but I knew in that moment 02:33.833 --> 02:35.933 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% that I really needed this adventure. 02:35.933 --> 02:37.733 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% So I just reminded myself of that 02:37.733 --> 02:40.566 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% as I looked down at my beat-up Adidas sneakers 02:40.566 --> 02:42.133 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% and I started down the switchbacks 02:42.133 --> 02:45.966 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% that would take me to this pretty grueling ten-mile hike 02:45.966 --> 02:47.300 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% across the canyon floor 02:47.300 --> 02:48.933 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% and over to my campground. 02:48.933 --> 02:51.233 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% And as I settled into the hike, 02:51.233 --> 02:52.800 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and I knew it was going to take a few hours, 02:52.800 --> 02:54.833 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% so I really didn't want to start thinking about 02:54.833 --> 02:57.733 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% getting hungry or getting tired or getting sore. 02:57.733 --> 03:01.400 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% So I put all my energy behind thinking about, like, 03:01.400 --> 03:03.766 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% big think topics, you know, 03:03.766 --> 03:04.900 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% like, "Where have you been, Lise?" 03:04.900 --> 03:06.766 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% And, "What have you been through 03:06.766 --> 03:08.900 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% "and what have you learned, and where do you want to go, 03:08.900 --> 03:10.033 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% and what do you want?" 03:10.033 --> 03:11.600 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And I just, I was, like, determined to 03:11.600 --> 03:13.833 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% Eat, Pray, Love my way through this hike, so... 03:13.833 --> 03:14.833 align:left position:25% line:89% size:65% (audience chuckling) 03:14.833 --> 03:16.300 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% After a bit of hiking, 03:16.300 --> 03:20.300 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% I just said, "I want someone who is captivated by me," 03:20.300 --> 03:24.466 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% just out loud, to the Grand Canyon. 03:24.466 --> 03:26.833 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% Nobody around, just said it to a rock. 03:26.833 --> 03:27.966 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% And I don't normally, like, 03:27.966 --> 03:30.400 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% make a habit of talking to rocks, 03:30.400 --> 03:32.866 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% but in that moment, I felt like the universe 03:32.866 --> 03:34.866 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% really needed to hear me say that, 03:34.866 --> 03:36.933 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% because at that time in my life, 03:36.933 --> 03:39.766 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I was in the process of leaving an abusive marriage, 03:39.766 --> 03:43.233 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and I was going through, like, a really terrifying divorce. 03:43.233 --> 03:45.166 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% To be down in the Grand Canyon 03:45.166 --> 03:47.533 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% and be surrounded with these rock walls 03:47.533 --> 03:49.333 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% that were thousands of feet tall, 03:49.333 --> 03:50.600 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% I just... 03:50.600 --> 03:52.766 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% It almost felt like this 03:52.766 --> 03:55.200 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% odd, freeing fortress of some kind. 03:55.200 --> 03:56.600 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% Like, on the one hand, 03:56.600 --> 03:59.533 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% I was completely untouchable by 03:59.533 --> 04:02.733 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% and protected from this one person, 04:02.733 --> 04:03.800 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% and on the other hand, 04:03.800 --> 04:05.500 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% I was in this big new world 04:05.500 --> 04:07.566 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% that had suddenly opened for me, 04:07.566 --> 04:10.500 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% and I could say yes-- even to that trip, 04:10.500 --> 04:12.600 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% saying yes was a huge deal. 04:12.600 --> 04:15.100 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% And I could be in a space that was free of chaos 04:15.100 --> 04:18.300 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% and full of peace and gave me the space 04:18.300 --> 04:21.800 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% to actually hear my own thoughts for the first time in years. 04:21.800 --> 04:24.500 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And I think that those two ingredients together 04:24.500 --> 04:26.466 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% really fueled my spirit of adventure on that trip, 04:26.466 --> 04:28.366 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% because I did everything. 04:28.366 --> 04:30.333 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% Like, I, you know, 04:30.333 --> 04:32.733 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% hiked across these tiny little footbridges 04:32.733 --> 04:34.166 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% with rushing water under them, 04:34.166 --> 04:35.600 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% and I crawled through these caves 04:35.600 --> 04:36.966 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% to get to these waterfalls, 04:36.966 --> 04:40.100 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and some of the waterfalls were 100 feet tall. 04:40.100 --> 04:41.866 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And shimmied down these rickety ladders 04:41.866 --> 04:45.300 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% and used these slippery chains to get to where I needed to be. 04:45.300 --> 04:46.933 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% And I think that's how I found myself, 04:46.933 --> 04:48.466 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% on the very last day, 04:48.466 --> 04:52.133 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% standing on a very small ledge overlooking a waterfall, 04:52.133 --> 04:53.433 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% wondering if I should jump. 04:53.433 --> 04:55.966 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% And this waterfall 04:55.966 --> 04:58.333 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% was the first jumpable waterfall we had come to. 04:58.333 --> 05:00.200 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% All the other ones were, like, certain death. 05:00.200 --> 05:01.833 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% They were way too tall. 05:01.833 --> 05:04.300 align:left position:40% line:83% size:50% This one was maybe 20 or 30 feet, 05:04.300 --> 05:08.100 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% but, looking over the edge, felt a lot taller than that. 05:08.100 --> 05:10.633 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And as I'm looking at that water underneath my feet 05:10.633 --> 05:14.700 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% and just thinking about my kids and copays and deductibles 05:14.700 --> 05:17.000 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% and all the bad things that could happen, 05:17.000 --> 05:19.133 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% I looked to my right for a moment 05:19.133 --> 05:21.433 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and I locked eyes with this guy Ron, 05:21.433 --> 05:23.000 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% who was part of the hiking group, 05:23.000 --> 05:25.266 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and he was just, he was waiting for his turn to jump. 05:25.266 --> 05:28.066 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And when I looked back at the water, I thought, 05:28.066 --> 05:31.366 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% how in the world had I not noticed until now 05:31.366 --> 05:34.700 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% how all-consuming his big, brown eyes were? 05:34.700 --> 05:36.333 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% (audience chuckling) Like, I hadn't noticed them 05:36.333 --> 05:38.033 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% the day before, when we were at Beaver Falls, 05:38.033 --> 05:40.766 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and I was writing all of my life's chaos in my journal, 05:40.766 --> 05:42.833 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and he leaned over and asked what I was writing. 05:42.833 --> 05:44.533 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And I didn't notice them the first night-- 05:44.533 --> 05:46.200 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% I sat right next to him at a restaurant. 05:46.200 --> 05:48.666 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% But now, on the edge of this waterfall, 05:48.666 --> 05:51.300 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% his eyes seemed to be everything I needed. 05:51.300 --> 05:54.566 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% So my eyes struck up this silent conversation 05:54.566 --> 05:56.866 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% with his eyes and just kept asking them 05:56.866 --> 05:58.733 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% if I should stay or if I should jump. 05:58.733 --> 06:00.666 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And so I'd look at him and I'd look at the water, 06:00.666 --> 06:03.300 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and then I'd look at him, and I'd look at the water. 06:03.300 --> 06:06.800 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% And at some point, he broke the silence and said, 06:06.800 --> 06:08.666 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% "You know, the story is better if you jump." 06:08.666 --> 06:10.366 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% (audience laughs) 06:10.366 --> 06:13.166 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% And before I could think of anything witty to say, 06:13.166 --> 06:15.400 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% he was standing directly in front of me, 06:15.400 --> 06:18.366 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% facing me on this very small ledge, 06:18.366 --> 06:21.133 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and he looked down at me and he just said, "Hi." 06:21.133 --> 06:23.033 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% And I looked up and I was, like... 06:23.033 --> 06:24.833 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% (voice shakes): "Hi." 06:24.833 --> 06:27.566 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% And a couple of seconds later, he bent his knees 06:27.566 --> 06:29.200 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% and jumped backwards off that ledge 06:29.200 --> 06:31.566 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% into the water. 06:31.566 --> 06:33.666 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% And about a minute or two later, 06:33.666 --> 06:35.233 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% I followed him forward in, 06:35.233 --> 06:37.500 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% you know, off the ledge into the water, 06:37.500 --> 06:40.466 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% in this gigantic physical leap of faith on my part, 06:40.466 --> 06:42.200 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% which turned into this 06:42.200 --> 06:45.600 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% unexpected emotional leap of faith for both of us. 06:45.600 --> 06:47.566 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% Because after we hiked out of that canyon, 06:47.566 --> 06:48.933 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% both Ron and I recognized, 06:48.933 --> 06:52.233 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% like, there was some energy exchanged 06:52.233 --> 06:53.933 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% on the top of that waterfall. 06:53.933 --> 06:55.766 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% And, you know, 06:55.766 --> 06:57.533 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% even though we both had our own things going on-- 06:57.533 --> 07:00.566 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% I had my own personal tornado on the sidelines, 07:00.566 --> 07:02.300 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% and I had kids, and he had kids, 07:02.300 --> 07:03.733 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and he was going through a separation 07:03.733 --> 07:05.000 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% and the whole thing-- 07:05.000 --> 07:07.600 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% we decided we needed to know about each other, 07:07.600 --> 07:09.700 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% and so we just dove in and we just continued 07:09.700 --> 07:12.533 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% that conversation that our eyeballs started 07:12.533 --> 07:13.900 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% on the edge of that waterfall. 07:13.900 --> 07:17.533 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% And we formed and built this relationship 07:17.533 --> 07:20.500 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% built on adventure and just going for it. 07:20.500 --> 07:22.066 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% We did everything. 07:22.066 --> 07:23.766 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% We went to races, we took all of our kids hiking 07:23.766 --> 07:25.366 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% through a bunch of national parks. 07:25.366 --> 07:28.933 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% We paddled and kayaked down the Colorado at Horseshoe Bend. 07:28.933 --> 07:30.400 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% And a couple of years ago, 07:30.400 --> 07:32.566 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% we found the perfect deserted beach in Kauai, 07:32.566 --> 07:34.866 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% and we got married 07:34.866 --> 07:37.000 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% and made our adventurous life official. 07:37.000 --> 07:39.300 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% And I think the coolest part 07:39.300 --> 07:40.966 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% about the whole experience for me 07:40.966 --> 07:43.333 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% is that right when we started dating, 07:43.333 --> 07:44.466 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% Ron had sent me a text message, 07:44.466 --> 07:46.766 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% and it said something about, 07:46.766 --> 07:49.500 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% "I'm just captivated by you." 07:49.500 --> 07:53.266 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% And it still takes my breath away to this day, 07:53.266 --> 07:55.833 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% because I only told that to the Grand Canyon. 07:55.833 --> 07:58.300 align:left position:42.5% line:83% size:47.5% Like, no one heard me say that. 07:58.300 --> 08:00.766 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% But I just think that it really supports Ron's theory 08:00.766 --> 08:03.433 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% that the story is better if you jump. 08:03.433 --> 08:06.933 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And I'm so glad I did. Thank you. 08:06.933 --> 08:10.333 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% (audience applauds and cheers) 08:10.333 --> 08:12.933 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪ 08:12.933 --> 08:14.033 align:left position:40% line:83% size:50% MOYER: My name's Martha Moyer. 08:14.033 --> 08:16.266 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I live in Somerville, Massachusetts, 08:16.266 --> 08:18.933 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and I used to be a math teacher. 08:18.933 --> 08:21.666 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% And two years ago, I retired from teaching math 08:21.666 --> 08:23.466 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% so that I could pursue my dream, 08:23.466 --> 08:27.033 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% which is to become a graphic artist and writer. 08:27.033 --> 08:29.033 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% I'm writing a graphic memoir. 08:29.033 --> 08:32.933 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% How does teaching math to children relate to storytelling? 08:32.933 --> 08:35.733 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% Not every child that takes math 08:35.733 --> 08:36.933 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% is all that interested in math. 08:36.933 --> 08:40.000 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And so I would just let the math incubate, 08:40.000 --> 08:41.900 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% and I would launch into a story, 08:41.900 --> 08:46.433 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% and it really just became a part of my teaching repertoire. 08:46.433 --> 08:47.700 align:left position:42.5% line:83% size:47.5% - Mm. - And it was fun. 08:47.700 --> 08:49.966 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% Who were the storytellers in your family 08:49.966 --> 08:51.400 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% or amongst your friends? 08:51.400 --> 08:54.866 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% Well, I think my mom was, like, a big-time storyteller. 08:54.866 --> 08:57.100 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% She made up stories as bedtime stories, 08:57.100 --> 09:01.133 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and we sat around the kitchen table for dinner-- 09:01.133 --> 09:02.266 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% it was back in the olden days-- 09:02.266 --> 09:04.200 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and my dad would always tell stories 09:04.200 --> 09:05.500 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% about what happened at work. 09:05.500 --> 09:08.366 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% So, Martha, I understand that this story 09:08.366 --> 09:09.366 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% is about your mother. 09:09.366 --> 09:11.066 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% It is, definitely. 09:11.066 --> 09:12.800 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% And is she going to be here this evening 09:12.800 --> 09:14.733 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% in the audience? - Yes, she is. 09:14.733 --> 09:18.133 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% I think they've reserved a seat for her in the front row, too. 09:18.133 --> 09:19.666 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% OKOKON: What do you think it will be like 09:19.666 --> 09:21.666 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% to tell this story on stage, with her in the audience? 09:21.666 --> 09:23.066 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% I don't think I can look at her. 09:23.066 --> 09:25.000 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% (both laughing) 09:25.000 --> 09:26.466 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% You know, I think it'll be great. 09:26.466 --> 09:28.033 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% I think it'll be good for her. 09:28.033 --> 09:30.533 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% I think she will feel good hearing this story. 09:30.533 --> 09:32.866 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% I think it'll be a great experience. 09:32.866 --> 09:34.200 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% I'm looking forward to having her there. 09:34.200 --> 09:36.566 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪ 09:36.566 --> 09:39.766 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% It's 1966, and I'm five years old, 09:39.766 --> 09:42.500 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and our family's going on a summer vacation 09:42.500 --> 09:44.466 align:left position:25% line:89% size:65% to Yellowstone Park. 09:44.466 --> 09:47.266 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% My brothers are nine and ten, 09:47.266 --> 09:50.566 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and they're in the back seat of the station wagon with me, 09:50.566 --> 09:53.833 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and it's pulling a camper, trailer tent, 09:53.833 --> 09:56.266 align:left position:35% line:89% size:55% and my mom, 09:56.266 --> 09:58.166 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% she's the passenger in the front seat, 09:58.166 --> 10:01.066 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% and my dad, he's a colonel in the Army, 10:01.066 --> 10:02.466 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% and he's driving. 10:02.466 --> 10:03.700 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 10:03.700 --> 10:05.700 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% We enter the park. 10:05.700 --> 10:09.766 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% I look around, and I'm confused. 10:09.766 --> 10:12.933 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% I don't see any yellow stones. 10:12.933 --> 10:15.833 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 10:15.833 --> 10:18.466 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% There are signs all along the road, 10:18.466 --> 10:21.733 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and I'm too young to read, but they have pictures, 10:21.733 --> 10:23.733 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% so I can tell what they're saying. 10:23.733 --> 10:28.233 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% The first one is a bison goring a child. 10:28.233 --> 10:32.100 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 10:32.100 --> 10:35.800 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% Next: a snake, and I know it's going to bite me. 10:35.800 --> 10:40.566 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Then a bear, and I know it's going to eat me. 10:40.566 --> 10:43.266 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% I don't think I'm gonna like this vacation. 10:43.266 --> 10:46.966 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% So we get to the campsite, and my dad and my brothers 10:46.966 --> 10:48.366 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% are putting up the tent, 10:48.366 --> 10:50.300 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and I run to Mom, and I beg and I plead, 10:50.300 --> 10:53.133 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% "Can we just go home? This is gonna be horrible." 10:53.133 --> 10:56.300 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% And she says, "No, this is gonna be a wonderful vacation. 10:56.300 --> 10:58.233 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% Camping is fun." 10:58.233 --> 11:01.566 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 11:01.566 --> 11:04.000 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% So if I'd asked my dad that question, 11:04.000 --> 11:09.133 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% he would have ordered me to just be quiet and not complain, 11:09.133 --> 11:11.200 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% and I would have said, "Yes, sir," 11:11.200 --> 11:13.000 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% because that's what we say to Dad. 11:13.000 --> 11:17.200 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% "Yes, sir," "No, sir," or "No excuse, sir." 11:17.200 --> 11:20.000 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% Even when he's at home and he's not in his Army uniform, 11:20.000 --> 11:21.600 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% he's always the colonel. 11:21.600 --> 11:23.900 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% So that's the way we speak to him. 11:23.900 --> 11:27.533 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% Now, Mom, she's really soft-spoken, 11:27.533 --> 11:31.900 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and she's a stay-at-home mom, an officer's wife. 11:31.900 --> 11:35.000 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% And she takes care of us, and my favorite time of day 11:35.000 --> 11:38.966 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% is when Dad's about to come home, and she gets ready 11:38.966 --> 11:42.000 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% by putting on a pretty dress and taking her curlers out, 11:42.000 --> 11:46.266 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and putting it up in a beehive and putting lipstick on. 11:46.266 --> 11:48.533 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% Then she greets Dad with a hug and a kiss, 11:48.533 --> 11:51.300 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% and she gets dinner on the table for the family. 11:51.300 --> 11:52.900 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% But just when Dad wants it. 11:52.900 --> 11:55.133 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% So now the tent is up, 11:55.133 --> 11:58.266 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% and we're fed and she puts us to bed, 11:58.266 --> 12:02.633 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% we're in our sleeping bags, and we sleep soundly. 12:02.633 --> 12:05.200 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% Then we're awakened by the sound of screams. 12:05.200 --> 12:07.333 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% My brothers are pushing behind me, 12:07.333 --> 12:08.700 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% and my mom is in front of me, 12:08.700 --> 12:11.466 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and she's yelling for my dad, and it gets louder, 12:11.466 --> 12:13.733 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% and my brothers are pushing and screaming, 12:13.733 --> 12:15.733 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and my mom says, "Be quiet, be quiet. 12:15.733 --> 12:17.366 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% Everyone, just shut up!" 12:17.366 --> 12:20.100 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% (quietly): So we get very quiet. 12:20.100 --> 12:24.800 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% Now, on the wall of the tent, I could see a shadow. 12:24.800 --> 12:27.000 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% First it's a mound. 12:27.000 --> 12:29.033 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% And it rises. 12:29.033 --> 12:31.966 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% And then ears sprout. 12:31.966 --> 12:34.266 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% It rises more. 12:34.266 --> 12:37.466 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% And then it has paws with claws. 12:37.466 --> 12:40.000 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% It rises more. 12:40.000 --> 12:42.766 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% It's the bear, 12:42.766 --> 12:46.366 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% the same bear that was on the sign that was going to eat me. 12:46.366 --> 12:48.566 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 12:48.566 --> 12:50.333 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And it pokes through the flap of the tent, 12:50.333 --> 12:53.200 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% and my mom, she lunges toward it, 12:53.200 --> 12:54.633 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% and she punches it and screams, 12:54.633 --> 12:56.366 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% "I've got babies. You've got babies. 12:56.366 --> 12:57.933 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% Now, you leave my babies alone!" 12:57.933 --> 13:02.033 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% (laughter and applause) 13:05.333 --> 13:08.100 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% Meanwhile, my dad has escaped through the back of the tent 13:08.100 --> 13:10.900 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and climbed over the camper and gone to the station wagon, 13:10.900 --> 13:13.000 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and he calls for my mom from the car. 13:13.000 --> 13:15.066 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% "Mary, Mary, come to the car!" 13:15.066 --> 13:17.300 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% And she screams back, "But the kids, the kids!" 13:17.300 --> 13:18.433 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% And my dad yells... 13:18.433 --> 13:19.633 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% (laughing): "Oh, yeah, kids, yeah." 13:19.633 --> 13:23.466 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 13:23.466 --> 13:26.400 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% My brothers, they push and they shove, 13:26.400 --> 13:28.066 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% and they just stay behind me. 13:28.066 --> 13:30.600 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% But I watched as my mom, she kicks the bear, 13:30.600 --> 13:31.866 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% she punches the bear. 13:31.866 --> 13:35.333 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% I'm only five years old and I watch. 13:35.333 --> 13:37.233 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Usually it's my brothers who are protecting me. 13:37.233 --> 13:39.500 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And she kicks it again. 13:39.500 --> 13:40.566 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% I can't believe it. 13:40.566 --> 13:42.366 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% I cover my mouth, I want to scream. 13:42.366 --> 13:43.900 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% It's like watching a game. 13:43.900 --> 13:47.400 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% And then she hauls off and she punches it really hard. 13:47.400 --> 13:49.666 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% The bear, it doesn't even budge. 13:49.666 --> 13:50.933 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% She takes two fists 13:50.933 --> 13:53.633 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and she comes down really hard on its nose. 13:53.633 --> 13:55.433 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% It doesn't even growl. 13:55.433 --> 13:57.166 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% Then she kicks it and punches. 13:57.166 --> 13:59.000 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% I know she's never gonna quit, 13:59.000 --> 14:01.233 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% and then she hauls off with all of her weight 14:01.233 --> 14:03.966 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% and she punches really hard and she screams, 14:03.966 --> 14:06.300 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% "I've got babies, I've got babies. 14:06.300 --> 14:09.100 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% Now you get out of here!" 14:09.100 --> 14:13.033 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% And the bear backs away, 14:13.033 --> 14:15.433 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% as if to say, 14:15.433 --> 14:17.533 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% "I don't want to mess with you. 14:17.533 --> 14:19.633 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 14:19.633 --> 14:21.666 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% I'll just go to the next tent to get dinner." 14:21.666 --> 14:24.333 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 14:24.333 --> 14:27.266 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% And Mom, she turns and she hugs my brothers and me, 14:27.266 --> 14:29.533 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% and cradles us. 14:29.533 --> 14:31.400 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% My brothers are crying. 14:31.400 --> 14:33.066 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% I'm not crying. 14:33.066 --> 14:36.333 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% And that's weird, because I'm the youngest. 14:36.333 --> 14:38.200 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% I usually cry. 14:38.200 --> 14:43.400 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% And my mom, she doesn't usually hit and kick and punch and yell, 14:43.400 --> 14:46.966 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and my dad doesn't usually hide in the car. 14:46.966 --> 14:50.066 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 14:50.066 --> 14:51.566 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% I just want to... 14:51.566 --> 14:53.866 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I just want to get up and scream. 14:53.866 --> 14:54.966 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% I feel so strange. 14:54.966 --> 14:56.066 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% I feel happy. 14:56.066 --> 14:57.766 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I want to jump for joy and dance. 14:57.766 --> 14:59.633 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% My mom beat up a bear! My mom beat up a bear! 14:59.633 --> 15:02.200 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 15:02.200 --> 15:04.433 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% She was right, camping is fun. 15:04.433 --> 15:09.366 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% (laughter and applause) 15:13.233 --> 15:16.566 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% But she rocks us and cuddles us. 15:16.566 --> 15:19.233 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% And I realize there's so much more to her 15:19.233 --> 15:23.566 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% than... than food, and curlers, and looking pretty. 15:23.566 --> 15:28.400 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% She's a fighter, and she'd fight to the death. 15:28.400 --> 15:30.266 align:left position:32.5% line:89% size:57.5% And my dad... 15:30.266 --> 15:32.800 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 15:32.800 --> 15:35.600 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% He gives orders, 15:35.600 --> 15:38.766 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and he orders us to never mention 15:38.766 --> 15:41.200 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% this Yellowstone Park incident 15:41.200 --> 15:43.433 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% ever again, as long as we live. 15:43.433 --> 15:45.300 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 15:45.300 --> 15:48.766 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% (cheers and applause) 15:53.066 --> 15:57.133 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% None of us said "Yes, sir" to that order. 15:57.133 --> 15:58.633 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughs) 15:58.633 --> 16:00.366 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% Thank you so much. 16:00.366 --> 16:04.933 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% (cheers and applause) 16:04.933 --> 16:09.333 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% It changed my perspective about what a woman could be. 16:09.333 --> 16:12.366 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% I... I had seen her 16:12.366 --> 16:15.600 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% as just really thin and delicate and beautiful. 16:15.600 --> 16:19.233 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% And when I saw her fight, I wanted to fight, 16:19.233 --> 16:22.333 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% and I became a stronger person. 16:22.333 --> 16:24.533 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% And of the three kids-- 16:24.533 --> 16:27.933 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and I think it might be because of this incident, 16:27.933 --> 16:29.366 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% because I watched it-- 16:29.366 --> 16:33.333 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% um, I do things that are challenging 16:33.333 --> 16:36.000 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% more than my brothers do. 16:36.000 --> 16:38.000 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪ 16:38.000 --> 16:40.266 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% HERBERT: My name is Jynelle Herbert. 16:40.266 --> 16:42.900 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I was born in Boston with Caribbean roots. 16:42.900 --> 16:47.000 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% I am a writer by trade. 16:47.000 --> 16:51.066 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I work for a nonprofit, a children's charity, in Boston, 16:51.066 --> 16:54.600 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and I always like to say, "I help save lives with my pen." 16:54.600 --> 16:56.033 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% You are a writer, 16:56.033 --> 16:57.866 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and tonight you're going to be sharing a story 16:57.866 --> 17:00.133 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% with us on the stage. 17:00.133 --> 17:02.800 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% And I'm wondering, what are sort of the differences 17:02.800 --> 17:05.633 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% in preparing for those two separate kinds of experiences? 17:05.633 --> 17:07.000 align:left position:35% line:89% size:55% The nerves. 17:07.000 --> 17:08.300 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% (laughs, Hazard chuckles) 17:08.300 --> 17:12.000 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% When you're in a space with other people, right, 17:12.000 --> 17:14.333 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% there's always energy. 17:14.333 --> 17:15.766 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% It's not just your energy. 17:15.766 --> 17:19.633 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% Like, when you sit down to write in front of a computer, 17:19.633 --> 17:22.433 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% you can sort of control your energy. 17:22.433 --> 17:23.900 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% But when you're in a room, 17:23.900 --> 17:25.366 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% you're vibing off of different people's energy, 17:25.366 --> 17:26.900 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% it might feel different. 17:26.900 --> 17:29.966 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% Once our audience does hear the story that you're sharing, 17:29.966 --> 17:33.066 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% what would you most want them to take away from that experience? 17:33.066 --> 17:34.900 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% Gratitude. 17:34.900 --> 17:38.900 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% Being thankful for the adventures in life, 17:38.900 --> 17:41.600 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% and being okay when things don't always 17:41.600 --> 17:43.266 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% go the way that you think they will. 17:44.466 --> 17:46.933 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% It's the summer after seventh grade, 17:46.933 --> 17:49.066 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% and I'm almost through 17:49.066 --> 17:51.066 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% my very first time at overnight camp. 17:51.066 --> 17:54.700 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I've overcome the fear of leaving Boston 17:54.700 --> 17:58.500 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% and trekking out to the boonies of New Hampshire-- 17:58.500 --> 18:01.466 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% (in accent): "Going back behind God's back," 18:01.466 --> 18:03.433 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% as we say in Trinidad-- 18:03.433 --> 18:08.300 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% to live in a cabin with strangers and weird bugs. 18:08.300 --> 18:12.566 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% I've ignored the looks of disbelief 18:12.566 --> 18:16.700 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% that come with being one of only two Black campers, 18:16.700 --> 18:20.333 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% the surprise that I actually know how to swim, 18:20.333 --> 18:25.300 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% and all the attempts to hook me up with my "perfect match guy," 18:25.300 --> 18:27.266 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% who just happened to be the other Black camper. 18:27.266 --> 18:29.600 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% (audience laughter) 18:29.600 --> 18:31.933 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% I focus on the positives. 18:31.933 --> 18:36.233 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Yes, the bugs are bigger up here, but so are the stars, 18:36.233 --> 18:38.666 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% without the glare of the city lights. 18:38.666 --> 18:41.600 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% The air is fresh, so I breathe deep. 18:41.600 --> 18:43.933 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% (breathes deeply) 18:43.933 --> 18:48.033 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% And I get to learn new things, like archery and riflery 18:48.033 --> 18:51.000 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and the lyrics to "Cat's in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin. 18:51.000 --> 18:54.200 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% (audience laughter) 18:54.200 --> 18:57.333 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% It's family weekend, and my family's coming to visit. 18:57.333 --> 19:00.433 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% Other than a few letters exchanged via snail mail, 19:00.433 --> 19:02.400 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% I haven't talked to them in weeks. 19:02.400 --> 19:05.333 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% So I'm excited to see them and dazzle them 19:05.333 --> 19:07.300 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% with all the new skills I've learned, 19:07.300 --> 19:08.966 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% including horseback riding. 19:08.966 --> 19:11.200 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% I've gotten past the sore thighs. 19:11.200 --> 19:13.766 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% I've learned how to post. 19:13.766 --> 19:16.200 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% That means lift myself up and down in the saddle 19:16.200 --> 19:17.666 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% while my horse trots. 19:17.666 --> 19:21.533 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% And I've also learned how to jump horses-- so much fun. 19:21.533 --> 19:25.433 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% My family line up by the fence to watch me ride. 19:25.433 --> 19:28.866 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% Even my cousin and aunt are here from Trinidad visiting. 19:28.866 --> 19:30.066 align:left position:25% line:89% size:65% A pleasant surprise. 19:30.066 --> 19:32.633 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% I'm doing great. 19:32.633 --> 19:35.633 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% I guide my horse to walk, trot, and canter. 19:35.633 --> 19:38.100 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% There are those looks of disbelief again. 19:38.100 --> 19:40.033 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Don't they know that one out of four 19:40.033 --> 19:42.133 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% American cowboys were Black? 19:42.133 --> 19:45.366 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% My family, though, they watch with pride. 19:45.366 --> 19:46.666 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% Even my cousin. 19:46.666 --> 19:49.133 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% It's time to jump. 19:49.133 --> 19:51.766 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% I'm nervous because I had only practiced jumping 19:51.766 --> 19:54.433 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% my horse, Misty, a couple of times. 19:54.433 --> 19:58.100 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% We ride round the bend and line up with the obstacle. 19:58.100 --> 19:59.766 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% I start talking to myself. 19:59.766 --> 20:02.333 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% "Time it just right, Jynelle. 20:02.333 --> 20:04.033 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% "Don't tense up in the saddle. 20:04.033 --> 20:06.733 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% Ease up on the reins a bit..." (gasps) 20:06.733 --> 20:09.066 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% I feel Misty's legs colliding with a pole, 20:09.066 --> 20:10.766 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% and suddenly I'm falling. 20:12.200 --> 20:13.966 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% I'm embarrassed. 20:13.966 --> 20:16.100 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% And I bet my cousin's somewhere in the crowd 20:16.100 --> 20:17.200 align:left position:25% line:89% size:65% laughing at me, too. 20:17.200 --> 20:19.833 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% I don't get up. 20:19.833 --> 20:21.666 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% I scan the crowd. 20:21.666 --> 20:24.000 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% I look for my family. 20:24.000 --> 20:27.133 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% They look concerned, even my cousin. 20:28.466 --> 20:31.300 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% Then I meet eyes with my mom. 20:31.300 --> 20:36.066 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% Just one look and I already know what she's thinking. 20:36.066 --> 20:39.166 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% See, my mom knows a thing or two about falling down. 20:39.166 --> 20:41.666 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% She lost her mother when she was ten, 20:41.666 --> 20:45.533 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% buried both her sisters before I was even born. 20:45.533 --> 20:48.400 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% She fell in love, got engaged, 20:48.400 --> 20:50.733 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% but then left the warmth of home in Trinidad 20:50.733 --> 20:54.500 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% to travel to cold, gray England to learn nursing. 20:54.500 --> 20:58.300 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% After years there, she left the life she had built again 20:58.300 --> 21:00.866 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% to move to Boston and meet her fiancé. 21:00.866 --> 21:02.433 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% When she arrived, 21:02.433 --> 21:05.033 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% she found out that he had broken his promise 21:05.033 --> 21:09.333 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% to wait for her, but only after he had gotten her pregnant. 21:09.333 --> 21:12.700 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% She was on her own, with a baby on the way. 21:12.700 --> 21:17.000 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% She worked nights and weekends and double shifts. 21:17.000 --> 21:19.400 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% As a Black woman and an immigrant, 21:19.400 --> 21:21.200 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% she knew all too well the looks 21:21.200 --> 21:24.166 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% of disbelief and expectations of failure, too. 21:24.166 --> 21:27.000 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% She put up with the disrespect from doctors 21:27.000 --> 21:28.900 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% who thought themselves better than her 21:28.900 --> 21:33.033 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% and patients who saw her more as a servant than their nurse. 21:33.033 --> 21:36.533 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% But she saved her money and she bought a house, 21:36.533 --> 21:39.066 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% and she got me into a great school system, 21:39.066 --> 21:43.133 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% always sacrificing, always on the sidelines herself 21:43.133 --> 21:44.633 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% so that I could explore. 21:44.633 --> 21:46.666 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% There was piano and dance 21:46.666 --> 21:49.100 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% and Girl Scouts and STEM for Girls, 21:49.100 --> 21:51.233 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% and the list went on and on, 21:51.233 --> 21:54.366 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% including this very expensive summer camp. 21:54.366 --> 21:59.133 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Now my mom was literally on the sidelines 21:59.133 --> 22:02.700 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% watching me, and I had to make her proud. 22:02.700 --> 22:04.633 align:left position:35% line:89% size:55% So I get up. 22:04.633 --> 22:07.300 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% I dust myself off. 22:07.300 --> 22:11.733 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Before my camp counselor can even ask, I say, "Yes. 22:11.733 --> 22:14.200 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% I want to try again." 22:14.200 --> 22:15.733 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% I'm back on the horse. 22:15.733 --> 22:19.066 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% Misty and I round the bend and line up with that obstacle. 22:19.066 --> 22:23.333 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% This time, we soar. 22:23.333 --> 22:28.866 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% Camp flew by after that with a couple of memorable incidents. 22:28.866 --> 22:32.200 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% There was an awkward kiss with my "perfect match" camper. 22:32.200 --> 22:34.200 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 22:34.200 --> 22:37.000 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% Which confirmed we definitely were not a match. 22:37.000 --> 22:38.566 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 22:38.566 --> 22:42.900 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% And a showdown with a leech in the back of a speeding van. 22:42.900 --> 22:44.700 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% I won't get into details. 22:44.700 --> 22:46.600 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 22:46.600 --> 22:49.600 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% Years went by, and there was tennis 22:49.600 --> 22:54.433 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% and theater and college and study abroad, 22:54.433 --> 22:58.766 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% and multiple scandalous spring break trips. 22:58.766 --> 23:01.533 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% A few people here know exactly what I'm talking about. 23:01.533 --> 23:03.533 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 23:03.533 --> 23:05.100 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% And then grad school. 23:05.100 --> 23:06.666 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% And Mom didn't even blink when I said, 23:06.666 --> 23:08.666 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% "I'm going back to grad school again." 23:08.666 --> 23:13.933 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% Before Mom passed away, we had so many adventures together. 23:13.933 --> 23:15.800 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% One trip found us in Aruba. 23:15.800 --> 23:18.400 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% Mom, in her 60s, decided that she was going 23:18.400 --> 23:21.166 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% to go horseback riding for the very first time. 23:21.166 --> 23:25.933 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% Before we get on our horses, I give Mom a few tips. 23:25.933 --> 23:29.333 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% "Okay, Mom, the guide and I are going to go first. 23:29.333 --> 23:32.200 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% "Now, horses can feel your energy, so keep calm. 23:32.200 --> 23:35.333 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% "And if it gets a little bumpy and you feel yourself shifting, 23:35.333 --> 23:37.500 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% just lean the other way, okay?" 23:37.500 --> 23:39.466 align:left position:35% line:89% size:55% We head out. 23:39.466 --> 23:42.133 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% I'm enjoying the scenery unfolding in front of me. 23:42.133 --> 23:44.766 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% It's like being in a postcard. 23:44.766 --> 23:46.366 align:left position:15% line:89% size:75% I look back to check on Mom, 23:46.366 --> 23:48.433 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% and she's leaning to the left a little. 23:48.433 --> 23:50.566 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% "Mom!" I yell, "Adjust! 23:50.566 --> 23:52.066 align:left position:30% line:83% size:60% You're leaning." (audience laughter) 23:52.066 --> 23:57.933 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% Next time I look back, my eyes nearly pop out of my head. 23:57.933 --> 24:01.966 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% Instead of riding atop the horse, she's on its side, 24:01.966 --> 24:04.300 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% one leg gripping its underbelly, 24:04.300 --> 24:06.766 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% the other desperately clinging to its back. 24:06.766 --> 24:09.500 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% She looked like a stuntman in a shoot-'em-up Western. 24:09.500 --> 24:11.533 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% (audience laughter) 24:11.533 --> 24:14.033 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% Before I can turn my horse around, thump. 24:14.033 --> 24:16.133 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% She falls into the dust. 24:16.133 --> 24:20.066 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% I'm off my horse and by her side, "Mom, are you okay?" 24:20.066 --> 24:23.633 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% I help her up-- she's not hurt, just embarrassed. 24:23.633 --> 24:28.066 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% "Mom, why didn't you lean the other way?" I ask. 24:28.066 --> 24:31.966 align:left position:35% line:83% size:55% (in accent): "Oh-ho! 24:31.966 --> 24:35.266 align:left position:25% line:83% size:65% "I thought you said, 'Lean the same way.' 24:35.266 --> 24:36.833 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 24:36.833 --> 24:39.500 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% Like when you're driving and you pick up a skid on the ice?" 24:39.500 --> 24:41.000 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 24:41.000 --> 24:44.000 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% Silence, then relief. 24:44.000 --> 24:45.766 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% We laugh, 24:45.766 --> 24:48.266 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% deep belly laughs that ripple through our entire body. 24:48.266 --> 24:51.500 align:left position:32.5% line:83% size:57.5% The tour guide, he's not laughing. 24:51.500 --> 24:52.733 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% (laughter) 24:52.733 --> 24:55.033 align:left position:20% line:83% size:70% We help Mom on her horse and continue on. 24:55.033 --> 24:58.600 align:left position:10% line:83% size:80% Mom and I were so lucky to have many more adventures together. 24:58.600 --> 25:02.100 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% There was the time we went on a harrowing helicopter ride 25:02.100 --> 25:04.466 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% over the Grand Canyon, 25:04.466 --> 25:05.900 align:left position:22.5% line:83% size:67.5% and there was the time she jumped 25:05.900 --> 25:07.166 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% on the back of my jet ski, 25:07.166 --> 25:08.900 align:left position:37.5% line:83% size:52.5% even though she didn't know how to swim. 25:08.900 --> 25:11.466 align:left position:27.5% line:89% size:62.5% Talk about trust. 25:11.466 --> 25:13.233 align:left position:20% line:89% size:70% And during chemotherapy, 25:13.233 --> 25:15.366 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% there was the time she climbed 25:15.366 --> 25:19.333 align:left position:27.5% line:83% size:62.5% Mount Washington-- not all the way to the top-- 25:19.333 --> 25:23.500 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% but we hiked, my mom, myself, and my twin boys, 25:23.500 --> 25:25.533 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% and I was so proud of her that day. 25:25.533 --> 25:27.433 align:left position:30% line:89% size:60% I'm so thankful 25:27.433 --> 25:30.000 align:left position:15% line:83% size:75% for all the adventures Mom and I got to go on together 25:30.000 --> 25:32.166 align:left position:10% line:89% size:80% and the example she set for me, 25:32.166 --> 25:34.633 align:left position:17.5% line:83% size:72.5% the life she made possible for me. 25:34.633 --> 25:38.000 align:left position:12.5% line:83% size:77.5% So during those times in life when it feels easier 25:38.000 --> 25:40.500 align:left position:17.5% line:89% size:72.5% to stay lying in the dust, 25:40.500 --> 25:43.866 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% the memories of her compel me 25:43.866 --> 25:48.200 align:left position:12.5% line:89% size:77.5% to get up and dust myself off. 25:48.200 --> 25:50.733 align:left position:37.5% line:89% size:52.5% Thank you. 25:50.733 --> 25:52.266 align:left position:22.5% line:89% size:67.5% (cheers and applause) 25:53.600 --> 25:57.100 align:left position:45% line:89% size:45% ♪ ♪